When it comes to the arts, there is something poetically appropriate and entirely acceptable about suicide. For Sylvia Plath, Virginia Woolf, Ernest Hemingway or Hunter S. Thompson, the paths they chose out of life seem to have immortalized them further. In many ways, literature has romanticized this action beyond its existence in reality.
But suicide in real life is so much harder to handle and understand. Like many of my columns, there is a personal anecdote involved here. On Jan. 12 around 1 a.m., my Facebook newsfeed was blowing up with status updates, all about a boy I went to high school with.
These mini-elegies led me to his profile page, where I read his final post and suicide note. The outpouring of grief I read online over the following days was both surreal and heart wrenching.
I hadn't spoken to Scott since we were lab partners in 10th grade biology, but still I found myself so very sad at the circumstances. The grief I felt (and still feel) was real, but more than just hating the idea of a life taken too soon, I grieved a loss that shouldn't have happened.
Last year, teen suicide stories were splashed across the media.
The social and civil liberties spotlight gave its 15 minutes of attention to bullying and closeted homosexuality.
Cyber-bullying and hate crimes against gays were vilified in every possible forum, and people felt good about opening a dialogue. Any progress made in this sensitive area is, of course, a needed step in the right direction.
But after last week's hometown tragedy, I realized the dialogue is still too narrow.
Scott wasn't a teenager any longer, but he had been diagnosed with bipolar disorder (BPD). In his final post, he requested that people learn everything they could about the disorder.
He worked with teens suffering from BPD, and he himself pulled others back from the brink. Reading messages left by kids he had helped made the tragedy of this situation all the more acute.
It isn't my place to make grieving for Scott personal — that is the right of his family and friends. What I can do instead is at least take whatever public space I have at my disposal and listen to his last request, to educate people on mental health issues:
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People with bipolar disorder type I alternate manic episodes with major depression, whereas type II alternates high energy with periods of depression.
Symptoms manic episodes include little need for sleep, being easily distracted, poor temper control, reckless behavior (including eating disorders), elevated moods and high energy levels.
Symptoms during depressed periods include daily sadness, difficulty concentrating, eating problems, fatigue, loss of self-esteem, trouble sleeping and pulling away from friends or family members.
The onset of depressive illnesses (including BPD) tends to peak between the ages of 15 and 24.
Stressors associated with college include academic pressures, adjusting to new environments, emotionally challenging relationships, irregular sleep and greater access to drugs and alcohol. These stressors can lead to mental health issues if not addressed or treated.
College is high energy, high stress and high excitement. We don't take care of ourselves the way our parents wish we might. But we can take care of each other.
Your friends are counting on you to be their counselor, their confidante, their support system. After everything I've seen in school, the best advice I can possibly give is to find that support system, and make sure it works.
If you are upset, you need to talk to someone. If you notice a friend is depressed, you need to help them if they won't help themselves. We have to look out for one another, and mental health is a serious issue that cannot be ignored.
The health center, as well as McCullough-Hyde Memorial Hospital, offers psychiatric services, in addition to online resources designed to provide answers. And while I can only pray that Scott found the peace he was seeking, I know that there are friends out there in need of help, and I hope with all my heart one of you is there to listen.
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