In the recent opinion piece for The Student, the author expresses her belief that "teaching men not to rape" might propagate the problematic notion that rape arises out of a misunderstanding. We agree wholeheartedly that the often-touted 'grey area' of rape, which has been referenced in several ill-informed opinion pieces written previously for this paper, is a harmful but common misconception about the dynamics of acquaintance rape.
Despite popular belief, rape is not a 'murky' crime, a 'bad decision' by 'good guys' who simply crossed the line because of miscommunication. In fact, research has concluded that young people are extremely able to understand refusals no matter how politely or obliquely they are manifested, and when perpetrators do not respect a softened "no," it is because they are choosing to do so (O'Byrne 2008, Kitzinger 1999).
Furthermore, college acquaintance rapists, who often go undetected (i.e. not arrested or prosecuted), differ in tactics but share much in common with incarcerated sex offenders. They are predatory individuals who tend to be serial and multi-faceted offenders, and who share motivational characteristics such as anger and hostility towards women, hyper-masculinity, generalized aggressiveness, a high degree of narcissism and entitlement, little empathy for others, and even psychopathy.
But here's the catch: Rapists, especially those who target acquaintances, do not see themselves as rapists, even when admitting to legal acts of rape. For the last three decades the research on these 'undetected rapists' has made that crystal clear. These young men will admit, even brag, about how they force and intimidate women into sex, or use unconscious or close-to-unconscious women for their sexual gratification. Just as troubling is that this failure to see acquaintance rapists as rapists extends widely through our society.
Thus, while the vast majority of people admit unreservedly that rape is wrong, they simultaneously believe that many if not most acquaintance rape victims are lying. This is clearly reflected in both widespread societal victim blaming and the fact that sexual assault is largely an unpunished crime, with only 3 percent of rapists ever spending a day in jail.
This is why education is an important facet of efforts to reduce rape. If we educate people about what rape really looks like, and about its devastating aftermath, we will see more enforcement of rape laws, greater discouragement of rape behavior, and even an increase in understanding in that defective minority of the male population who believe that "scoring" by whatever means necessary enhances their masculinity.
Miami is already implementing bystander education and the 'It's on Us' campaign that encourages good people to intervene if they see predatory behavior, and for that they should be applauded. In addition, Miami should also be proactive in educating its students on the rape myths and misconceptions that permeate our society, as well as the effects of rape trauma that destroys too many of our young peoples' futures.
Furthermore, given some of the troubling conversations we have personally overheard, Miami needs to emphasize to their students that there is no "perfect" victim, that in fact, perpetrators are more likely to target vulnerable women and men who have been drinking or are seen as promiscuous because they know that society will believe them less and blame them more. Rape is that premeditated.
Miami should also follow in the footsteps of universities across the nation and adopt an affirmative consent policy that creates a baseline for enthusiastic and affirmative consent to sexual activity. As Jaclyn Friedman, co-editor of Yes Means Yes" notes, "Misunderstandings are the exception and not the rule. The vast majority of rapists are not confused as to whether or not they had consent. 'Yes means Yes' stops making excuses for those guys. It changes the culture so that anyone engaging in sex should be genuinely into it."
Finally, while we agree with the author that we could focus more on our reactions to sexual assault, it is on us to shift the culture so that we are reacting to rapists in the form of strong sanctions, not more "rape prevention" for women that has ultimately proven to be utterly ineffective in reducing sexual assault rates for the past 30 years.
Mary Williams,
Laure Uribe
WAVES
Nadia Dawisha,
Title IX Media Task Force