"I'm late because there was a ton of traffic." "I didn't scratch the car mom, Paul had it last." "Nothing's wrong, I'm fine."
We're all guilty of a little fabrication so we don't have to come face to face with the truth. We convince ourselves that made up stories may be easier to hear than what really happened. We all believe that by lying we are sparing hurt feelings, whether someone else's or our own. The truth of the matter is, lying does the opposite of its intention. Somehow both parties involved will end up hurt no matter how hard you try to spin the situation in your favor.
Lying, in a sense, is another way of telling someone they cannot handle the truth. In the end people usually end up being more upset about the fact that they were lied to rather than the lie itself. Lying takes you on a more complicated and messy route to eventually telling the truth. It is also a way of expressing that you are incapable of facing the truth. The length of Pinocchio's nose was a testament to just that. He kept telling others he was a real boy because he so desperately desired to be one. While our noses may not grow every time we tell a lie, our guilt does. After telling a lie, more lies usually have to be created in order to create the perfect fake situation. If you're going to lie about where you're going, you usually have to lie about who you're with, what you did there and how long you stayed. Looking at it in perspective, doesn't it make more sense to just tell the truth? No need to worry about all the fabricated lies, and no more drowning in guilt.
There are many different kinds of lies people can tell, white lies, not lying but not telling the whole truth, bad lies and good lies. People tell lies on a daily basis. According to The Daily Mail, researchers found men tell six lies a day, while women only tell three. Is anyone surprised?
What qualifies as a good lie? If your significant other never finds out you've been cheating, are you a good liar or just a bad person? If you try to lie but fail, are you a bad liar or a good person for 'fessing up?
People can spend years living a lie and must deal with the trials and tribulations of covering it up daily. Those unfaithful lovers who spend years engaging in devious and sketchy behavior behind the backs of their supposed loved ones must work hard every day to keep their second life a secret.
When does the lie become worth it? When does it no longer become worth it so the truth comes out? It is not possible to pinpoint a spot in the long line of lies where a person can say "Yes, this is why it's worth it." That's because lying is never worth it.
So, why do we lie? As I sit here I know I will continue to tell lies in an effort to sidestep the hurt feelings of loved ones. Does that make it any less harmful? If the intent is to protect others and ourselves is lying still as toxic as people say it is? Is lying ever okay?
Of course when planning a surprise party or buying gifts for a friend white lies are necessary, but you're essentially creating a longer, more complex path to the truth.
In the future we should rely on the power of the truth and hope what seems worth the web of tangled lies is something you have the power to face head on.
Enjoy what you're reading?
Signup for our newsletter
Read More
How one professor and her classes are preserving Oxford’s Black history
By Sean Scott | March 20, 2024Jazma Sutton, an assistant professor of history, teaches The Black Midwest (HST 350Q) and Black Women in America (HST 450D) classes. In both courses, she has students working with the Smith Library of Regional History and Miami’s archives to document and preserve Black history in Oxford.
Miami faculty members recount Freedom Summer in new documentary
By Luke Macy | February 25, 2022After seven years of work, “Training for Freedom,” a documentary highlighting Oxford’s involvement in the Freedom Summer of 1964, premiered on PBS Western Reserve on Valentine’s Day.
“Documenting the COVID-19 Pandemic”: History in the making
By Alice Momany | August 29, 2021In March 2020, Miami University’s archives launched “Documenting the COVID-19 Pandemic,” a collection focused on life during the COVID-19 pandemic.