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Humor: Guy who couldn't finish group project wouldn't last two days in Vietnam

Senior Sophie Flack was "beyond frustrated," she said, when the men in her economics class group project contributed little to their presentation on Friday, Oct. 19. Fellow senior Brett Halliday, said Flack, was the worst offender.

"I don't even think he opened the Google Doc," Flack said. "And during our presentation, he just stood there looking hungover."

Flack said what comforted -- but also terrified -- her was knowing that Halliday wouldn't last two days in Vietnam.

Flack said that, when she's particularly bored in class, she thinks about how the men sitting around her would fare if they were alive 50 years ago and drafted into the Vietnam War. She feels Halliday, especially, would be "a disaster" if he were dropped into military conflict overseas.

Halliday's housemate, Tim Goldberg, said that in Halliday's defense, "he probably would've thrown up if he tried to say anything," during their economics presentation.

While Flack agreed, and noted that Goldberg would probably be okay in Vietnam because he's "absolutely shredded," she was still frustrated with Halliday.

"Does he even realize how easy he has it, being a 21-year-old guy in 2018 and not 1968?" Flack said.

Halliday's great grandfather, Richard Stamper, who did not participate in the Vietnam War but spent the years 1942-44 in the Navy fighting in the Pacific theater of World War II, agrees with Flack.

"Brett really is a mess of a human being," Stamper said. "And have you met his friends? God help us if there's another draft."

Stamper said Halliday's sister, Megan Halliday -- a straight-A sophomore at The Ohio State University -- makes him "a hell of a lot prouder," but that he wouldn't trust her to fight in the dense jungles of Okinawa, either.

"At least Brett is a man," Stamper said.

Halliday admitted that he would "probs not" fare well in armed military conflict, but wanted to make it clear that he is "basically a goddamn pioneer" in other ways.

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"When all my [fraternity] brothers were afraid to drink White Claw because it was too girly, I drank it," Halliday said. "Now everyone does, but I was the one who opened that door for them."

daviskn3@miamioh.edu